photo4Dear William,

Today is has been exactly a year since you came into our lives. It often felt like the anticipation of you was going to make my heart burst with excitement. I thought about you constantly, wondering about all of your details, worrying about being the best mother to you. Now, I think about you every minute of the day. You are my first and last thought. To be your mother is both an extraordinary gift and a heavy responsibility. The connection that I feel with you is not even something I can relate in words. You grew in my body, a part of me, and now you are a year old growing into a little boy. You are climbing and standing – preparing to start walking and running. Soon you will be running away from me and I will be chasing you, worried you will fall. And, you will fall. And I will pick you up. This is a process we will repeat many times over until the day you are old enough to pick yourself up. It is my job to prepare you to live in a world where you feel independent and strong and capable of picking yourself up. My responsibility to you is out of great love to give you security, stability and the courage to be your own. It will be hard for me. Not because I don’t want you to explore the world on your own but because I love you so much that I want only wonderful, beautiful things for your life. I will be scared for you. I will hurt for you. But, I will also cheer for you and be the first one in line for a hug, a high-five and a beaming smile of pride.

You will always be my baby. You changed my life for the better the day you were born, and I will never be the same.

I love you.